Olivia Colman's new film Wicker has ignited a conversation about heteropessimism and what it means for modern relationships. The erotic fable, in which Colman's fisherwoman enjoys a mutually supportive, sexually satisfying partnership with a man woven from wicker (Alexander Skarsgård), has sent the internet into a frenzy—mostly among women. But beyond the horny comments and the hilarious New York magazine article asking what would happen if you had sex with a wicker dick, there's a deeper question: why does this fantasy resonate so strongly?
The Wicker Fantasy: A Basket Case for Desire
In Wicker, Olivia Colman plays a fisherwoman who finds love and lust with a basketmaker's creation—a man made of wicker, voiced and embodied by Alexander Skarsgård. The film's premise is loopy, joyful, and unexpectedly poignant. As the trailer shows, the wicker man is "strong as a tree and just as hard," a statement piece that's both literally and figuratively crafted for pleasure.
But why a basket? The film seems to suggest that a partner who is literally woven—handmade, artisanal, perhaps even customizable—offers something that flesh-and-blood men often fail to provide: reliability, attentiveness, and a lack of emotional baggage. It's a fantasy that speaks to a growing cultural conversation about heteropessimism, the idea that heterosexual relationships are inherently disappointing or doomed.
What Is Heteropessimism and Why Does It Matter?
Heteropessimism is a term coined by writer Asa Seresin to describe the pervasive sense of disillusionment with heterosexual relationships, particularly among women. It's the feeling that men are a letdown, that straight sex is often unsatisfying, and that the whole enterprise might not be worth the effort. In Wicker, this pessimism is turned into a playful, erotic fantasy: if men are disappointing, why not build one who isn't?
The film's wicker man is strong, silent, and sexually available—but he's also literally constructed by a male basketmaker (Peter Dinklage). This adds a layer of irony: even the ideal man is made by a man. Yet the fantasy persists, and the internet's reaction—mostly from women—suggests that heteropessimism is tapping into something real.
The Internet's Horny Reaction: A Collective Fantasy
Social media has been flooded with comments about Skarsgård's wicker physique, with many women expressing a newfound attraction to basketry. The New York magazine article, "What Would Happen If You Had Sex With a Wicker Dick?," tackled the practicalities with a game gynaecologist, discussing splinters, lubrication, and condom advisability. It's a humorous but telling example of how heteropessimism manifests in pop culture: by turning frustration into absurd, joyful fantasy.
The article's gynaecologist admits, "But what do I know about wicker? Nothing." That disclaimer is part of the charm—it's a fantasy, not a reality. Yet the fact that so many women are drawn to it suggests a genuine desire for something different, something crafted with care.
Olivia Colman's Role: A Star Turn in a Loopy Fable
Olivia Colman is no stranger to playing complex, relatable women, and her role in Wicker seems to continue that tradition. As the fisherwoman, she brings warmth and humor to a character who finds satisfaction in an unconventional partner. Colman's performance is already generating Oscar buzz, and the film's feminist undertones are hard to ignore.
The fisherwoman's neighbors gossip about her wicker lover, calling him "strong as a tree and just as hard." It's a moment that blends small-town judgment with unapologetic female desire—a combination that feels both timely and timeless. Colman's ability to embody that desire without irony is part of what makes the fantasy so compelling.
Why Heteropessimism Resonates: The Real-World Context
Heteropessimism isn't just a cinematic trend; it reflects real-world frustrations. Studies show that heterosexual women often report lower sexual satisfaction than men, and the burden of emotional labor in relationships falls disproportionately on women. In that context, a wicker man who is literally built for pleasure—and who doesn't demand anything in return—is a powerful fantasy.
The film also plays with the idea of mutually supportive partnership. The wicker man isn't just a sex object; he's a companion who supports the fisherwoman's work and desires. That's a far cry from the stereotype of the emotionally unavailable man, and it's a vision of heterosexual romance that feels both aspirational and impossible.
What's Next for Wicker and the Conversation
As Wicker prepares for release, the conversation around heteropessimism is only likely to grow. The film's blend of erotic fantasy and social commentary is a winning combination, and Colman's star power ensures it will reach a wide audience. Whether it will change anyone's mind about heterosexual relationships is another question—but it's already sparked a much-needed dialogue. The background to this story is set out in Wicker Husband Backlash: Basketweavers Critique Skarsgård's Wicker. A related thread runs through Justin Hardy Dies at 61: Wicker Man Sequel Director Passes.
In the meantime, the internet's horny comments and the gynaecologist's bemused article serve as a reminder that fantasy can be a form of resistance. If heteropessimism is about acknowledging disappointment, then Wicker is about imagining something better—even if that something is made of woven branches. Earlier coverage in Children of the Wicker Man: How the Folk-Horror Classic Haunted shows how the argument developed. A closer look at the same subject appears in Olivia Rodrigo Stands Up for Vulnerable, Taylor Swift Silent.
FAQ
What is heteropessimism?
Heteropessimism is a term coined by Asa Seresin to describe the disillusionment with heterosexual relationships, particularly among women. It encompasses the feeling that men are often disappointing, straight sex is unsatisfying, and the effort of heterosexual romance may not be worth it.
Why is Olivia Colman's Wicker causing a stir?
Wicker has sparked conversation because its premise—a woman finding sexual satisfaction with a wicker man—taps into heteropessimism and female desire. The film's playful take on fantasy and the internet's enthusiastic reaction have made it a cultural talking point.
Is Wicker a feminist film?
Wicker can be seen as feminist in its portrayal of a woman's sexual satisfaction and autonomy. By imagining a partner who is literally crafted for her pleasure and support, the film critiques traditional heterosexual dynamics and centers female desire.
What did the New York magazine article about wicker sex say?
The article, titled "What Would Happen If You Had Sex With a Wicker Dick?", featured a gynaecologist discussing practical concerns like splinters, lubrication, and condom use. It humorously acknowledged the absurdity of the question while engaging seriously with the fantasy.
For those intrigued by Colman's latest role, the Olivia Colman Jimpa interview on trans rights and family drama offers another side of her advocacy. Meanwhile, critics are already praising her performance in our review of Wicker, where Olivia Colman shines in a folk-horror romance. The film's blend of eroticism and horror is further explored in Olivia Colman and Alexander Skarsgård's discussion of steamy folk-horror Wicker.
As autumn approaches, Wicker is poised to be one of the season's most talked-about releases. It joins a lineup that includes Tom Cruise, Olivia Colman, and Rocky in the best films of autumn 2026, ensuring Colman remains at the center of the cultural conversation. Whether Wicker will shift perspectives on heteropessimism remains to be seen, but it has certainly ignited a dialogue worth having.